South Africa - 11 December 2007

Well, its now Dec 11th 2007 and it seems that Christmas is almost here. Shouldn’t snow be falling? Children playing, having fun..!? Well there certainly ain't any snow! Quite a few children playing having fun, mostly black kids because the white ones are in their BMWs with their parents on the way to the mall! Johannesburg (which I shall call Joburg from now on, cos I’m so cool an down with the lingo, yo!) is the city of shopping malls. Young people from 17 to whatever drive fancy cars which I was a little disgusted at but after being in ‘Joburg’ :o) for a while I realize that without a car, independence is a non-reality really, unless you take the taxis, which no-one does except black people, Syd an me! The malls (shopping centers, for those of you who need to get with the lingo, yo) are crazy and a BIG culture here. Depending on which area you are in, be it English, Jewish, Zulu, Afrikaans, the centre will vary. For example in the Jewish malls, not a hint of Christmas, which is expected obviously as they do not celebrate Christmas. Then heading into most other malls and you are confronted with a barrage of middle aged white women walking quickly from one end of the mall (with their black maid trailing behind carrying all the Gucci and Calvin Klein bags) to the other rushing not to be late for the manicure, then the haircut and don’t forget shiatsu massage. I am being unfair, its not quite that bad, but it is hard to convey the level of it without seeing it. There is still very much a divide between whites and blacks, there are an increasing number of black people in the ‘middle classes’, but the majority are still oppressed, living in shacks 10 Kilometers walk from where they walk or living on the roof of the building where there ‘madam’ has them in a 6 square meter shack with their 5 children and no food but pap (porridge like cous-cous stuff, yummy – well yummy to me who eats it by choice and not for every meal!). I could talk about it all day, people say it is getting better but I ask you, when did you last see a white person living in a township, or even visiting?

Anyway, malls, so you meet this throng of people madly dashing about, the Matrics have just finished school (just finished high school and off to college/uni) so you are also met by skateboarders, your classic nerds, girls which so much make-up on you swear they look bullet-proof, and the rest. Christmas music plays over the P.A, all the greats, Nat King Cole, Frank Sinatra – you know the ones but they have all been remixed either into a poppy, boy/girl band style or an electrifying punk/rock version that leave the original rather like how a puppy leaves your favorite teddy after a rampant chewing session! So you stroll about looking at all the deals that are on (which are not all that good) and in the corner Santa’s Grotto, oh man how exciting, much to my dismay Syd won’t let me go and sit on his knee, so after a small huff and a chocolate ice cream, I decide to take a look and Santa is a black man! He he, with a huge belly rumbling, toothless laughter he welcomes the children to his chubby knee and warm heart, handing out gifts to children that are smiling, listing what they want for Christmas or looking petrified at this enormous man with sausages for fingers wrapped around their waist as he hands them a rectangular box, wrapped in spider-man or Barbie paper. With the combination of all these things, it looks like Christmas, I can barely hear the Christmassy-ness form the music above me but it doesn’t feel like Christmas. It is about 25-30 degrees today, I am sitting here in my shorts and t-shirt and I am hot. I have been talking with Syd’s parents (Penny & Donald) about the Christmas meal and they talk of having a braai (BBQ, check me an ma lingo) for Christmas meal, it seems so funny. They don’t really celebrate it, they are Jewish, well kinda, not staunch but they are of Jewish origins. So we’ll see I am used to going all out as you all know, the turkey, the tree spewing with prezzies, but I am really looking forward to doing it a different way. I find it incredible to watch other people/cultures doing celebrations like this, it can really open your eyes, see things from a different perspective. I believe the more perspectives you can see more things from the better you will understand its whole shape. So that’s whats going on here at the moment. I have been enjoying having Syd and my little house all to myself each day, I have been doing some work for Penny (Syd’s ma) around the cottage, fixing steps, sinks, toilets, hanging mirrors and my favorite project so far was restoring an old antique cupboard made from African Oak and Oregon. I had to find the same wood, treat it all, build the whole thing from scratch really as a lot of it was very rotten. Fitting the door and mounting a big mirror into the door, carving elaborate designs into the wood and restoring its old but funky charm, it has been fun. Syd and I head down to Cape Town on the 27th of Dec, which is very very exciting, so amped (excited, yo) to see Fish, miss that boy, and be beside the sea again, miss the smell of the salt and the gentle rustling of Lewis’s beard in the wind! Penny has begun trusting me with her car so I have been driving around Joburg, get that, me, Stuart, finally driving! Woohoo! Been very exciting, driving here is a bit of a trip, the taxis are like VW camper vans and stop anywhere, and I mean ANYWHERE. On the highway they’ll stop in the road and pick people up, people do hand signals to tell the driver where they want to go and he will reply with the corresponding hand signal to tell them if he is going there (for example to go to ‘Fourways’ where I am living, you hold up 4 fingers) so they cut in front of you and go through red lights and its crazy, good fun, I think it is a good first experience of driving in a city because I must be very aware. I just read that back and I made it sound very dangerous, for those ladies out there that are panicking about my safety, fear not fair maidens, its not that bad!
Syd’s family have two dogs, the guard dog, Tai, who is enormous and reminds me of Sweepy, big black dog that lives outside and smells. I think the smell is a good deterrent for burglars, never mind her rows of shiny razor-like teeth. The other is Luella, or Lu-Lu as she is affectionately called, she is a spaniel – something cross and bless her was born without a brain. She is SO cute, she loves attention and falls asleep the second you put her on your lap. When I am in the cottage all day painting and drawing she will come down to say hello and cover me in saliva. She will jump up on my lap and crash there for an hour or two before waking, stretching, giving me a quick look and hopping off to the next adventure, leaving me in a cloud of green and I’m pretty sure poisonous bodily gasses! They are great fun, and there is good ol’ Mr Black who is a tough ass black cat. Mr Black has gashes (and I mean gashes) on his legs and…well…other legs. He goes away fro weeks at a time then comes home ripped to shreds looking very proud of himself and screams for a bowl of milk and a scratch behind the ear. All the animals seem to get on well, including the family!

I went to the Kruger National Park a few weeks ago and saw lots of Buk (Impala, Kudu, etc) I saw giraffes, elephants and all that jazz, very beautiful and very hot. It has been a dream of mine to go to Mpumulanga (name of the area where Kruger is) for many years and I made it! I have played with a Mamba, when I say ‘I played’ I mean I was at the other side of the room while Gavin (aka The Beast) handled it, it was incredible to see, even from my slightly distant but very safe view point!
I am looking forward to heading out on adventures with Syd Willow, she has been and is working so hard, I’m very proud of her, incredible, determined girl, but we all know that! She finishes her job this Friday so hopefully we can get Penny’s car and head off to some cool places for a chill, more sights and sounds out there calling me to them, looking forward very much!

Well I think that is all for now, I’m heading off now back to ma hoosie to finish off this cupboard, (I’ll take photos), and make some coffee for Penny and I.

Hey, guess what, I have been accepted to Art School out here. Ruth Prowse school of art in Cape Town, I start at the end of January. I am having a bit of a nightmare sorting out the fees though which is a bit painful. I can’t take a student loan here cos I’m not South African, I can’t take one in Scotland because I’m not spending it in Scotland and if I take a loan its impossible because I have to pay it back straight away and you cant earn money out here. It is another challenge and I am enjoying all these challenges I am being faced with. This place is incredible people, I urge you to come out here, forget what you have heard, forget what you think you know, unless you have been here you cannot pass judgment and I promise when you do , you will have nothing but love for the place. It gets under your skin, the people are beautiful and always smiling. Of course you’ll find the things that you here and you may see some things but if you go to the surrounding areas of Glasgow you’ll see it there too, Dundee has the highest pregnancy rate for under 18s in the world, Scotland has one of the highest heroin problems and Glasgow is renound for its stabbings, all these things that we hide from and think we are protected from are closer to your door step than you think, the point is that there is no need to hide from it, it is very real and there are so many who can’t hide from it, to do so is ignorant, selfish and predominantly white! So come, see this beautiful place where the sun is plentiful, the people want nothing other than to help and laugh with you. Sizwe, the gardener, is awesome, we listen to reggae together while he cuts the grass and I saw wood for my cupboard or build a wall. He lives in a shack that has not roof at the moment and has little money for food and he is one of the rich ones. He comes every day with a big smile, he greets me but tapping his heart, shacking my hand in an elaborate way that took a while to learn and smiles that big smiley grin full of milky white teeth and giggle s as we talk and share a coffee, nothing but smiles and giggles and that is everywhere, impressive hey. I don’t mean to preach but I think it is a shame for you all not to see this country because of what the media has shown you, since when did you believe all you read in a newspaper!??!?!

My adventures go on, where to next, we’ll see. Bren your stories are incredible and warm my heart when it is chilly here like the brandy you guys shared at base camp. I love that you are out there doing this, I think it is so admirable and strong of you. Love you man. As for the rest of you, I love you, I don’t miss you (which is a good thing) not to the level where I am scared, I want to be here and I don’t doubt that for one second. Have fun, keep smiling and remember no matter where you are in the world, even if it is boring old home you can still have adventures, people do there every day! Don’t forget to put that into your life now and again, Roo is a good one to talk about that! I love you all….peace. Stu xx